Monday, April 27, 2009


Well yesterday after church Joel and I went to my parent's for lunch. Although mom was away dad said he was BBQ steak and to come over. Well when we got there he was busy getting everything ready and then said I saw Pastor Br**** over the weekend(he was our old pastor when I was a kid) and pretty sure he was on some good drugs. I said well why on earth would you say that about a pastor and dad was like well he said Congrats on becoming a grandfather. My dad was like um you must be wrong, I am not going to be a grandfather. It was then that Pastor B said oh my goodness I am so sorry I made a mistake. Well I couldn't even believe this, I was like well dad he may have made a mistake but you are going to be a grandfather. He freaked out and was so excited and kept asking over and over if I was serious. I am still shocked that Pastor B said that to him as he would have had no idea, the only people who knew before dad was my BFF who doesn't even know him. Crazy!!

Well after lunch I started feeling pretty nauseaus. Great, m/s starts and I have to fly out in a few hours. Well we went to shoppers and got me some saltine's without salt for my flight. The first flight (2 hours) was pretty rough. I was eating those and sipping on ginger ale. By the time my next flight came I was feeling a lot better , however it was 4 hours and I didn't sleep a wink. I was so tired when I landed.

Well as soon as mom and I got back to the hotel, I said I have a present for you and dad told me to video tape your reaction because he figured it would make you cry. She was like why on earth would you get me a present and I said just open it. So she is opening it and then her jaw dropped and she was like oh my goodness are you PREGNANT?? I said yes and she immediately freaked out. She was so excited and said she cannot wait to go shopping for little jelly bean.

Well mom had to go off to work this morning and when I woke up she had a little note written of how she is so blessed, and that she cannot put it into words but she loves me so much and is so proud of me. She also said she loves our precious son or daughter already and that she cannot wait to hold them in her arms.

My parents are going to make the most amazing grandparents and I cannot wait :)

Well now I am off to go get a massage or pedicure, can't decide yet but I am leaning towards pedicure. I don't think I could lay on my boobs for an hour. Yes they are sore, and yes they have already grew an inch(YIKES). I am in trouble.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Time To Tell Mama

A few weeks ago my mom bought me a trip to Edmonton to meet her there for a week of shopping and relaxing. She flew up for business on Wednesday and today I am going to meet her. While there I am going to be telling her our great news, I feel really bad that I have to tell her and my dad separately but there is no way I would be able to hide it from her for a full week.

So this is how I decided to tell her, I made this, this morning and I think it is the cutest thing ever, although I am a little biased.

I am feeling good overall, If I didn't miss my period I would have no idea I was pregnant at all. I am not really tired anymore and my bloat has slowly gone away, I am not peeing anymore than normal either. Yesterday morning I did wake up at 4:45 am and was starving and felt a bit sick so I went out the kitchen and got a granola bar. So there I was, sitting in bed, in the dark eating my granola bar. Joel thought it was the funniest thing ever. Other than being hungry all the time, I feel great. I POAS again this morning because it still doesn't seem real. It came back positive yet again, so hopefully it will sink in soon.

Friday, April 24, 2009


I am just over the moon excited that we got our BFP. Thank you God, you answered our prayers at the most perfect time. It is hard to believe that we are finally expecting. I am still having trouble believing it. I don't know if this is normal or not but I feel like I am going to wake up one morning and it will all be over with. I guess this might be because I have little symptoms. I am not even peeing a lot which everyone apparently has. Don't get me wrong I am thankful I don't have them yet but I guess I am just nervous. I am sure this feelings will pass with time. Please tell me I am normal for feeling like this? Or is it completely crazy?

Wednesday, April 22, 2009


I don't have a digital on hand and am way too tired to go out and get one so I will do that tomorrow, just to see the word Pregnant but for now here is the $ test

The Best Day

Yesterday was by far the best day of my life.

First Finley and I went for a walk on the boardwalk with my good friend Jenna. It was then that she broke the news she was 3 1/2 months pregnant. I almost started to cry right then but I was so happy for her and Marc. We then went back to her house and had some lunch while we talked about being pregnant having babies and how amazing it would be to be on maternity leave together.

Well after getting home I was pretty tired but we were having a friend of ours for supper so I had to prepare everything and clean the house up a bit. I was also feeling a bit nauseaus but chalked it up AF arriving shortly.

Well fast forward to around 5:00pm, the phone rang, Joel answered and than gave the phone to me. It was my doctor calling, this was weird as her office closes at 3:30pm. She says Amanda I got your tests back and I wanted you to know the results right away, are you sitting down?

I responded with yes and that is when she proceeded to tell me that the my pregnancy test came back POSITIVE!!!

That's right, We are PREGNANT!!!

Well she gave me the little lecture of what not to do in the next week since I can't get into see her until after my trip but she was so happy for us.

after hanging up I immediately went out to Joel who was doing the dishes and just hugged him from behind, all while I was sobbing.

He was wondering what was up and once I could finally get the words out I said " Your Going to be a Daddy." He was in just as much shock as I was and kept asking really? over and over. It was such an amazing moment and not how I planned to tell him at all but it was perfect.

Baby S is due Dec. 28,2009. Please stick little one and grow to be a healthy baby. We love you so much already.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Doctor's Update

Overall my appointment went really well, I was there for over an hour though but just because she wanted to check everything.

First she wanted a urine sample to send to the lab to rule out pregnancy and UTI. Well I told her there is absolutely no way I am pregnant because my temp has been dropping for the last few days but she wanted to rule it out anyway.I gave her this months chart at the time for her to few it. She then did an internal exam and took samples in case it was a vaginal infection while doing this she checked my ovaries and said they felt good but I would need an ultrasound to see if there are any cysts.

So I get my results back on Weds and then we will go from there.

After all this,she looked at my chart some more and was really interested as she has never saw one before and that is when she said she would really like to start the workup for testing. She said that since we have basically been having unprotected sex and charting since August and trying since before than she felt it was time. Also she leaves on maternity leave in June and wanted to have all my bloodwork and such done so she can give me a referral before then.

I am really excited about this, it feels like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. So Joel goes in on Friday and has a physical at this time he will be requesting a SA and then I go in CD 18 - 24 do do my first round of blood tests where they will test my progesterone levels.

So take a look at my chart, I have no idea what to think anymore. I was convinced AF would be here today or tomorrow but after this mornings temp I have no idea. Kinda crazy for it to take a jump that high the day before AF but I am sure that is what will happen. Tomorrow will likely be a huge temp drop, just one last thing to throw me off.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Emotional Day

Well yesterday was quite the day. I woke up around 5:50 am, which was bit early for a Sunday but I had gone to bed at 9:00 pm because I was so tired and in pain and the best thing was bed. So I temped in the morning and my temperature was done yet again, I expected that, I know cycle #10 is done it is just dragging it out. So I got up, had a shower, made a a flourless cake for my aunt's birthday party in the afternoon. She has celiac, hence the flour free cake. Then I watch Coronation Street for about an hour and got up to start breakfast and sat down to eat with Joel. So overall my morning was great until about 10:00am when we went to church.

So I am in church worshiping God and all of a sudden feel my emotions get the best of me and do everything I can to hold them in and not break down in tears. This went on for about 4 songs when our Pastor got up and said there are people in here right now that need prayers. Raise your hand if you need one. I knew I did but there was no way I was raising my hand as I would lose it and break down crying. Well they played another song and at this time people were praying for others and along came a women in our church and said she really feels God is telling her to pray for me. I immediately broke down and started bawling. I really don't know why, I wasn't sad about this cycle ending like the others. I just feel numb. Obviously I was doing a good job at avoiding my emotions and filing them as far away as I could. I am really happen this happened as I felt so good after she prayed and I got it all out. Although the poor women has no idea what I was crying for she just knows I needed prayer and will continue to do so. It feels nice to know God was there and knew I needed the encouragement and that he is always there, I just don't always turn to him for help in the beginning.

I can't even imagine what the congregation thought was going on. I am usually a really bubbly, happy person so it must have been a shock to see.

Moving on to the afternoon, it was a great day. We had a family gathering for all the April birthday's. We do this every month as our family is about 35 people so we have quite a few birthdays and it is easier to celebrate them together. We had a wonderful meal of stuffed pork chops, whipped mashed potatoes, turnip casserole and broccoli salad. With 5 assortments of cakes to top it all off. It was a wonderful time to spend with family.

After our lovely afternoon Joel, myself, my mom, two aunts, uncle and several cousins went back to our church as we were hosting the Watoto Children's Choir. They were absolutely amazing. If you ever have the chance to check them out I highly encourage you to do so. These children were once all AIDS orphans in Uganda and are now living for God by touring the world and ministering to people through song and dance. However right now they have 8 homes waiting in Uganda to take children off the streets and give them good homes but due to our financial instability in North American they do not have the money to do so. In order to take a child in they need to be sponsored. This only costs $35 a month or $440 a year. Which really is pocket change. That is less than one coffee a day, how can one not afford that when in reality we spend much more than that on useless things during the day.

I really encourage anyone who is interested to look up this missions group. as it truly is a wonderful thing to be involved in.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Soon to End

Well I am now 13 DPO and my temp has been dropping for the last two days. Cycle #10 is now coming to an end. It hurts, I am not going to lie. Moving on to cycle #11 is scary seeing how it is only 1 away from the dreaded 1 year mark when all the testing begins.

I am not too sure how this month will go as I am going away for a week and will get back two days before estimated O time(16 DPO). I have O'd on this day for most of my cycles so hopefully it will stay this way and not change. I am looking really forward to this trip. My mom is going away for business and is taking me along free of charge as she knows how much I need to relax and have a week full of me time. So I will be shopping, getting pampered, sightseeing, and chilling with my mom for the week. I am quite excited. Hopefully Joel and Finley will fare okay when I am gone.

On another note: I will be going in to see my doctor tomorrow as I have been having really bad lower abdominal pain accompanied with back pain for the last week. I have had this pain for the last month but it was more of a dull ache that has now progress.

My diagnosis: a cyst
Dr's diagnosis: We shall soon see

Friday, April 17, 2009

The Climb

So this song basically sums up how I have been feeling lately. I can almost see it, that dream I'm dreaming but there's a voice inside my head saying you'll never reach it. My faith is shaking and there are some days I just want to give up but we have got to keep trying and as hard as it is got to keep our heads up. Our time will soon come and all the troubles will be so worth it. It seems like it has been so long since we started all this and I never imagined it would take this long. I didn't think it would happen on cycle #1 but there is no way I thought it would be 10 + cycles.

Miley Cyrus..The Climb

I can almost see it
That dream I'm dreamin but
there's a voice inside my head sayin
you'll never reach it
Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shacking but I
I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

there's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
ain't about how fast I get there
ain't about what waitin on the other side
it's the climb

The struggles I'm facin
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down but
No I'm not breakin
I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most yeah
Just gotta keep going

And I, I gotta be strong
Just keep pushing on

Keep on moving, keep climbing
Keep the faith baby
it's all about, it's all about
The climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, whoa

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

I hate the 1ww

From the time I was two my mom told me I was very impatient. Joel tells me this all the time. This characteristic is not a good one to have when you are TTC. Especially when you have symptoms you don't usually have. I am a sucker for playing into them and I usually end up disappointed. I really hope this time is different, but it will probably just end up being a fluke of some sort. I no longer think I will be pregnant at the end of each cycle. I have become a pessimist I suppose. Which I think I do more to protect myself but with that being said I am really praying this is it for us. If it isn't than we will only be one month away from the year mark and that really freaks me out.

Currently I am 9 DPO with an ugly chart, crazy cramping, tender breasts and fatigue(although this could be due to the busy schedule I have had around finals.

I am not sure when I will test if I do this cycle or if I will wait it out. If I do I will likely give in around 13 DPO(Sun), that is usually the day I lose my will power. Thank goodness for $ PG tests.

Monday, April 13, 2009

I am bad at this

I haven't blogged in quite a while, I have been so busy with school. I am happy to say I have one final left to write tomorrow and then I will be done of my undergrad degree. I cannot wait. Now I have lots of time to stay at home with a baby if I ever get one.

I am now in the 1 week wait. The first week flew by with no trouble at all. Now to just get through this last week.

I had a nice temp drop yesterday accompanied with sore BB's and slight cramps today. Which is quite early. I am praying it is a good sign and that it was implantation.